If one more person calls you impressive, you're going to lose it.
What the observers can't see, is that you handle everything because you have to.
It's an automatic reflex. Passed down to you. A learned behavior, modeled to you by those who came before. It's what you do to survive, and what your caregivers did to survive, and what your elders and ancestors did to survive in empires that were not built for them them.
Over-functioning, perfectionism, intellectualism, hustler mentality... these are your family heirlooms, long standing norms and traditions in your lineage that you have never felt empowered to disrupt.
Because disruption would require that you learn to stop, on purpose. Learn to attend to your needs. Or your boundaries. It would invite you to reclaim rest, pleasure and space to breathe.
Ain't nobody got time for that.
So you can't sleep? No big deal. The bone-deep exhaustion is the price you pay to remain in the familiarity and comfort of staying busy and alive.
You used to nod and smile at being called "impressive". The gesture would ease your disease long enough for you to get home, pour a big glass of wine and turn on your liberation playlist.
But here is the thing dear one, those days are gone. We are living in a time of ecological collapse, collective trauma, and oppressive systems that on the surface, seem to be strengthening. It is hard not to question everything, including yourself.
The world is on fire. And as a result you are living in a state of survival.
I am here to let you in on a little secret.
There is nothing wrong with you.
If you feel stuck in survival mode, especially if you are a multicultural person impacted by the trauma of assimilation, forced migration, a first or second generation immigrant, queer, trans, black, Indigenous, multi-racial or multicultural... it is not your fault.
If fact, part of our work will be to learn to give thanks for these protective parts that have kept you and your people alive this long.
And while there is nothing wrong with you, there is is something deeply wrong with the systems and structures that are currently collapsing around you.
exhausted?
capitalism fatigue
lonely?
white individualism
imposter?
white supremacy
depressed?
traumatic shock
enraged?
ancestral trauma
anxious?
gatekeeping
insecure?
gaslighting
fearful?
internalized colonization
As we walk this path together, you might start to question why boundaries are so hard for you to set. Curiosity replaces survival as you practice release. Realizing that you may have not gotten what you needed in earlier years can feel vulnerable and overwhelming. And sometimes, things will feel worse before they feel better.
You will need curiosity and radical compassion to avoid staying stuck and overwhelmed during this excavation process. My job is to remind you of that over and over.
The context of intergenerational and historical legacies of trauma matter in your family. Who raised you. Who raised the people who raised them. What soil they were born on and how that soil informed their life. I cannot say it enough. CONTEXT matters in effective trauma processing.
Transformation will begin to occur not by changing what has happened to you but by shifting how it lives inside of you. By working with the texture of the trauma slowly, chewing away at it so that you can more easily metabolize and move through generations of pain. Eventually you will arrive at a sense of choice where you have previously felt disempowered.
It is in this sacred place that you get to explore... what is the legacy you want to carry, what burdens would you like to release, and how do you want to honor the legacy of your ancestors and family members who were not able to do this brave work.
reuniting with self
Picture this:
You're living in a state of Flow. You feel free in yourself.
“Freeing yourself was one thing, claiming ownership of that freed self was another.” – Toni Morrison, Beloved
Intentional
Integration
Healing is not linear. Sorry to tell you, but even when you reach therapy goals, you aren’t “fixed”. But that is because you were never broken to begin with.
Even so, sometimes the hardest part of therapy is knowing when to end therapy.
After you scatter the seeds of a flower into a pot of fresh soil, it needs time to settle before it sprouts. The flower needs time to find its rhythm in communion with its new environment, including the air, sun and water, before growth becomes integrated and rather effortless. And even then, the flower will eventually outgrow the pot.
Disruption will one day be necessary again for continued flourishing. But until that day comes, even the flower needs rest in order to fully bloom.
Learning to free yourself from the survival states that the colonial capitalist patriarchy traps you in, is brave, arduous, cyclical, deep, life-long work. Because the powers that be don’t want you to be free. So if you decide to do this work and eventually taste that sweet nectar of liberation, you must stop and enjoy it. Otherwise, what is the point?
So if you’re feeling uncomfortably seen at this point, great. That means that we might be a great fit.
You need a relational trauma therapist with lived experience of marginalization, who understands you on an energetic, non-verbal, body level.
Hello dear one, Bem-vindo.
I’m Laura
I am a white passing daughter of immigrants from South America, born on Turtle Island. My feet, my soul, and my body have always felt split between two vastly different worlds. But they are both a part of me, and they inform my relationship to you, to nature, and the world. So I will bring them to our work together.
Assimilation can be an uncomfortable inward process to challenge. I know this because I have lived it. Similarly, I understand how internalized oppression, trauma and unconscious resiliency move through my own body.
If you know nothing else about me yet, know this:
I will never ask you to do work I have not done myself first.
Let me also introduce you to my trusted friend and co-facilitator in this work with you. Natureza. This is the word for nature in my native language of Portuguese, pronounced na-TOO-reza.
We’ve got you.
FAQ
Frequently asked questions